When Your Life Doesn’t Match Your Hopes and Expectations

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When your life doesn’t match your expectations, it can be quite painful. Don’t try to minimize the pain by playing the blame game or pretending you don’t care. Instead identify whether you need to change your life, your expectations or both…then walk in your power and be more committed to taking action and less committed to complaining, quitting, or blaming others.

It is always easier to make the necessary changes if you remain optimistic, have faith that things will unfold as they should….not always as you expect…and that each experience will grow and stretch you.

Preparing yourself to take action will ignite passion, vitality, and increased interest. Taking action will also bring new options and will open up possibilities that you never knew existed. Think of your life as a puzzle and each time you take a step forward you will be granted a new puzzle piece. More and more steps equal more and more puzzle pieces and eventually your picture will become whole.

I learned this very lesson through a book project that I was leading for a women’s movement. We had set out on a mission to write and publish a book; however, we were starting with a zero budget. In fact we were in the minus due to prior projects that we had hosted.

We began to map out a plan for raising funds and securing sponsorship to offset the cost. Things were going very slowly at first and because of the time and hard work that was involved, members began to leave the movement. Before long the number of members had dropped to less than half from when we started; however, the remaining members were not to be denied. We met to revise our plan and started the trek to continue fundraising and event hosting. We continued to take small steps towards our goal and right in the middle of this endeavor a couple that I didn’t even know stepped up and decided that they would like to fund the entire book project. They had heard about us through our work in the community and expressed the desire to get on board and support our movement. This meant we could use funds already raised to host more events and to reach more people. We took steps towards our goal and others stepped up for us in a major way. I would dare to say that God met us where we were and elevated us because of our faithfulness.

Things may not work out the same way, but you must keep stepping even if the journey is long and grueling. And when things go left, as they sometimes will, maintain a positive attitude and be gentle on yourself. Also refrain from placing the blame on others. This is your journey, not theirs.

Keep moving…change courses if you must…but never let go. And always remember that the only limits to your expectations are the ones you place on yourself. Stay faithful and keep reminding yourself that if you stay on track, God will meet you right there where you are.


Teresa L. Holmes




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