Give Yourself Permission to Make Mistakes



Just as your reaction to personal victories defines you, so does how you respond to your mistakes. I used to be the Queen of beating myself up when I faltered. Not because I was striving to be perfect, but because I was so concerned about what others might think.

This went on for many years, until I attended a business conference for work. One of the speakers there said, “No matter if you tear yourself to pieces when you make a mistake or give yourself permission to do so, you are still going to make others. So why not just accept that your are not perfect, there will be missteps, and make a vow to learn from them.”

That speaker changed my entire perspective on how I looked at my mistakes and even on how I viewed those of others. I became more forgiving and as I began to learn more and more about self-esteem I found that putting myself down because of every little (sometimes big) mistake, I was actually diminishing my self-value. I also learned that there was value in making mistakes. They help you grow, teach you lessons and allow you to pass those lessons on to others.

Another thing I learned when I looked at the mistakes of my past was that I was reluctant to take responsibility for them. There was always some excuse (that I disguised as a reason) or it was someone else’s fault.

Now I own my messes, and believe me I can still make them. However, I have learned to take responsibility for my actions, no matter how much strife it may cause me. You too may be an “excuse maker” when it comes to your mistakes, but trust me it is NOT helping you when you fail to take responsibility. When (not if, because you will) you make a mistake drop the excuses, accept what you did with no regret, and go directly into repair mode.


Teresa L. Holmes, The Esteemologist

Teresa Train station 4

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